International Babywearing Week 2012 - Day 1

Hello.

I have altogether too many posts in my posts-to-complete-and-publish file* and they're stopping me from getting on with the nitty-gritty of Actually Blogging so I'm going to ignore them and come back and do them another day**.

It's International Babywearing Week!  Woop!  Inspired by a question posed by Georgia from Documenting Delight on facebook, here is photographic evidence that yes, it is possible to babywear in heels.  This was at a wedding we attended when Jacob was 2, and helped us speedily get from the carpark to the church, and to contain him during the service.

I sold this shortie (BB Slen Green Peas, if you're interested) a while back and miss its softness.  I have a new shortie winging its way to me ready for #2, which I think I was red-carded for this morning.  I can't wait to have a squishy baby to get slinging.

One month to go!

*this is not a real file, it's a section of my head that I mostly ignore due to overwhelming feelings of Guilt.
**maybe.

Bump watch - 23 weeks

 My two precious kiddiwinks ;)

Still able to do a Double Hammock (just!) in a size 6 wrap - slinging a friend's child at the Zoo.

Cousins

Tuesday, June 5th

With my sister Cate's due date being yesterday, and me just getting over my usual half-term fluey thing, I had planned to drive down to Devon with Jacob today, so I could spend a few days with her, going to see What to Expect When You're Expecting and doing other such pregnant-sister delights.

All of that was scuppered, when my alarm went off at 6am this morning and I saw a text from my sister at 2am, saying "Off to the hospital, will keep you posted...".  At 6.30am, the landline rang and it showed my sister's mobile number - I answered, expecting her to say it was another false alarm and they were back home.  Instead, her lovely voice said "I had a baby!".

She had arrived at the hospital to find herself already at 9.5cm dilated (really, I thought that kind of thing only happened in sitcoms), jumped in the birthing pool, and squeezed out a baby a few short hours later (I'm sure it was more difficult that I'm explaining; it's just that in comparison with my 32.5 hour labour, episiotomy and 2nd degree tear, I'm just slightly jealous).  

So before 6 hours had passed, I'd driven 200 miles (Jacob stayed dry for the whole journey!), settled in to my parents' house, and dashed off to the hospital for some newborn cuddles.  And ahhh, cuddle we did ;)

Anouk Amelie, my precious niece, born 5th June 2012.

 3 generations of females :D

Wednesday, June 6th

On day 2, Jacob got to meet his cousin (he wasn't allowed into the hospital as he wasn't a sibling) and was very taken with her.  When he woke up that morning, I told him "I've got some very exciting news.  Auntie Catey's baby came out of her tummy!" Jacob was very excited and said "I've got some exciting news too Mummy.  I love you!".  Bless him ;)

Jacob meeting his cousin, a little apprehensively, but unfortunately not allowed more time to get to know her due to my Dad refusing to let him settle and get used to her :/

Thursday, June 7th
On Day 3, I spent a few hours reassuring my sister about breastfeeding, having lots of chats, and getting her out of the house for a walk.  And being SO excited about getting to have a newborn of my own before the year is out!

Anouk, mistaking me for her Mama ;) 

She looked so happy when her frantic flailing resulted in the right two fingers getting in there. 

Catey doing the International sign for babywearing - jazz hands.  I helped her get set up using her Close sling, and here Anouk is latched on and feeding, where she stayed during our shopping trip/walk.

Friday, June 8th
We stayed for 4 days then sadly had to make our way home.  Jacob coped admirably with all the change, and carried on using the potty/toilet perfectly, with only one accident when my Dad took him away without seeing if he needed the potty first (and then not telling me that he'd had an accident until all opportunity for changing him had passed), enough said.  We slept in the same bedroom (Jamie couldn't get time off work so wasn't with us), with Jacob on a mattress on the floor and me in the big bed.  He kept waking in the night and saying "Mummy, are you there?" which was the loveliest thing in the world.  He doesn't half make a lot of noise in the night, though!  Lots of sleepless nights resulted for me, especially as I began to feel proper kicks inside, which were properly keeping me awake ;)

I took this photo in the pitch-black middle-of-the-night, you can't quite tell but he was lying completely sideways on his bed, with his head hanging off.

Why I love SLINGS

Voting through the ages - J-cub accompanying me into the polling booth aged 2 months, 14 months and 26 months.

I'm just catching International Babywearing week by the very skin of my teeth. The irony being, of course, that I haven't slung J-cub this week, or even for the memorable past. He walks around 2 miles a day quite happily, only requesting "Nicking him up Mummy!" if we come across a particularly deep patch of mud or thicket of brambles that he just can't splosh or fight through.

And whilst I miss his closeness, and the happiness that having him chattering over my shoulder gives me, I'm just as happy to see him haring off down a path, legs going like pistons, because he's seen the glint of a puddle in the distance or a bird has just flown away and he wants to talk to it. He's growing up, and I'm slowly selling or packing away or lending out my slings.

Of course, having said that, I'm sure he'll now demand to be carried everywhere for the next few weeks.

So, without further ado, the various slings which have enabled our babywearing journey in all their glory....

#1 - The BabyBjorn

Often referred to (in babywearing circles, anyway) as what I used when I didn't know better. Knowing that Jamie has back issues, we elected to get the BabyBjorn Active, which is supposed to do all kinds of clever weight-spreading things, so that the user is as comfortable as possible and the weight doesn't put any strain where it shouldn't. Unfortunately, these types of mass-produced carriers do just that. They seem to hang the weight off your shoulders and neck, rather than distributing it around your waist - even a simple home-made Mei Tai is infinitely better engineered when it comes to weight-distribution. Jamie actually found it comfortable until he fell down the stairs and had to stop carrying, but the first time I put it on (J-cub weighed 17lbs, I recall) I felt like he was literally hanging on a strap round my neck, and I had terrible shoulder-strain for the next few days. It may be that we had not adjusted it correctly - but bearing in mind I can now carry a 3 stone toddler for hours with ease, I do think that these types of carriers don't built on the centuries of available experience in slinging babies. They also don't allow the baby to be carried with their knees higher than their bum, which prevents too much pressure being placed on their spine - more traditional carriers give knee-to-knee support which is a much more natural position for the baby to be in. Slingguide.co.uk has some fantastic information on the different types of carriers, and puts across their viewpoints about BabyBjorn-type carriers here.

#2 - The Infantino Side-Rider

(See start of post for picture - on the left.)

Note: still available to buy if anyone wants it - I haven't got round to ebaying this yet.

I picked this up in TK Maxx (which quite often has good branded carriers at loooow prices) to see if it was more comfortable than the BB. It was, allowing me to breastfeed while I hung the washing on the line, and J-cub slept quite happily in it while I pottered around the house. It was like a revelation to me. I was constantly worried he was going to fall out or his head was going to fall off though - I wish I'd had something more secure at that time as it might have brought me round to full-time sling-use a lot earlier.

#3 - The Mei Tai

On holiday in Pembrokeshire, tickling J-cub's feet to keep him awake 'til we got home.

As a result of my success with the Infantino, but wanting something a bit more secure and multi-functional, I started Googling (ahhh, if only I'd found the Natural Mamas forum at that point. I'll just insert that there, in case you're getting bored. LOADS of info there). I found some recommendations and a sewing tutorial to make a Mei Tai - a traditional Asian carrier. I told my mum I was planning on cracking open the sewing machine and giving it a go, but she kindly read through the instructions and suggested it might be a little beyond my modest skills. She spirited the printed instructions away and returned with a Mei Tai a few weeks later.

I fell in love with it straight away - it was so comfortable, so easy to use, and I started using it all the time. In fact I continued using it right up to about a year ago, when I realised that he was getting a bit big for it. It's now out on loan to the lovely Emily at The Tangled Yarn, although I'll be demanding it back (or getting my mum to make me a new one) if (ha!) and when baby #2 comes along.

#4 - The woven wrap - Girasol

When boyface started getting a bit heavy, and nothing else was going on in my life and I was looking for a new hobby, I decided to have a go at a woven wrap. These can be a bit baffling, so I won't preach to the converted or try and explain something you could read about elsewhere. Suffice to say - they rock. Supportive, comfortable, multi-functional, and fun. You can do front, hip and back carries, you can use them as swings, hammocks and blankets. Just learning how to do the different carries is great fun, and when you crack it, you get a huge sense of satisfaction. I've never felt more comfortable than when J-cub's been up on my back in my Girasol, it's like having a great big hug.

Lots of people go a bit mental with the wraps, ending up with cabinets full of them (which, to give them their due, they do use) as they come in several different lengths, and obviously the available colourways across all the different manufacturers are numerous. I can't afford to be doing that, so I went for a bog-standard, cheap-as-chips, second-hand Girasol Laguuni to start with. And, to be fair, I got it right first time. Nothing else I've tried can beat it for softness and supportiveness. It's definitely a keeper. But see, if it gets dirty, you need another one to use while it's in the wash...

#5 - The woven wrap - Storchenwiege

So I succumbed and got myself a spare - going for a Storchenwiege Inka which I'd been lusting after for weeks. I always thought of this as my workhorse wrap - I was happy for it to get muddy and sandy and to be used for swinging on or as a roof for a den...

and I loved it while it was here, but I wanted something prettier. So I sold it. And that makes me kind of sad, now. I miss it :(

#6 - The Ring Sling

I got a cheapy cotton ring sling off ebay, for about £6, just to try it out. Ring slings are great for quick up-and-downs - they're really quick and easy to put on, and I for times when you'd normally carry your little one on your hip, they allow you to do so hands-free, with a little extra support. When J-cub was going through a big separation-anxiety phase, I could get on with washing up or cooking with him watching. I perfected sliding him onto my back in it, which was surprisingly comfortable (I normally don't like a lot of weight on one shoulder) and I used the cheap ring sling a lot. I guess that it wasn't as supportive as it could be though, so I splashed out on a BB-Slen ring sling which are made from a woven wrap.

#7 - The REAL Ring Sling

It made such a difference, and I used it loads. It's so quick and easy to use, and I'd probably still be using it now, but I loaned it out to a friend in need when J-cub stopped wanting to be slung around the house. I do miss it for those super-clingy times though!

#8 - The Shorty

Shorties are short woven wraps - usually between 2-3 metres in length rather than 4-5 metres. I bought this one out of necessity - we were going to a wedding and I didn't want the faff of a long wrap, I wanted something smarter than the Mei Tai, and my ring sling didn't go with my dress. So I sourced and bought this particularly to go with the dress, and it went perfectly. It was just what I needed, as we had to park a long way from the church and J-cub was not in a walking mood, it kept him contained while we were in the church (you can see here I'm licking his fingers clean after feeding him Welsh cakes - lovely) and gave him somewhere to cwtch when he got tired. It's just like a ring sling, in that it can be worn in a very simple hip carry, but you can do front and back carries with it too. Apparently. I've never managed it.

(Oh, it's a BB Slen in Green Peas, if you're interested).

#9 - The Soft-Structured Carrier (SSC)

My babywearing journey is almost complete - I got my SSC around this time last year, and if we were still using slings a lot I'd be looking for a pre-schooler sized one now, as this no longer supports J-cub knee-to-knee and is not quite as supportive as it once was. When we first got it though, he was weightless. I could carry him all day, with not so much as a twinge of "Ooof! You're getting a bit heavy up there"ness. It's a Babyhawk Oh Snap!, bought second hand (as indeed all my slings have been), and I love it. So quick and easy, just click and go. I've got more comments and questions about this than any other carrier, and I'd highly recommend it.

And finally...

#10 - The woven wrap - Didymos or FISHIES!

Hoernum Fische (above) and Petrol Fische (below)

Didymos are the epitome of woven wraps. They make lots of limited editions, and all kinds of special weaves and blends of things-I-don't-quite-understand. I'd been lusting after some printed with fish (babywearers seem to either love or hate these fish - I love them) for a long time, and a fellow BLW-forumite took pity on me and sent her Hoernum Fish on holiday here for me to try out. And oh my holy alpaca, were they ever soft. So beautiful, and I've never wrapped with so much ease. Just perfect. Again, another one to add to the list for baby #2.

So of course I wanted my own, sold my Inka and some other stuff, and bought myself some petrol-coloured ones. They're beautiful. Of course, this was around the time that J-cub decided he didn't actually want to be slung any more, thank you very much, so this one has not seen much love. And therefore might be sold on before too long, as I feel a bit guilty having that much expensive fabric sitting around doing nothing. But I'm glad I got to own them, I've scratched all of my babywearing itches, and I'm 100% more prepared for slinging a baby second time around.

To conclude, slinging rocks. The happy, knowing smile when you see a fellow sling-user checking you out; the cuddles; being able to use stairs and go off-road and on-beach; not having to find a place for a buggy in the house or car (ours has been languishing in the garage for nearly a year, with just a solitary outing to the zoo in April to boast about); and the never-ending chatter in your ear.

Such as, when I was standing on a narrow pavement in my local town, waiting to use a cashpoint. There were two cashpoints; one was out of order, and beeping to indicate there was a problem, and the other was being used by a lady. I walked up to the first, realised it wasn't working, so turned to queue at the second. J-cub said something along the lines of "Beep! Is beeping! Beep beep!" and I replied "Beep beep! It's doing BIG beeping, isn't it? Beeeeeeep!". At which point the poor woman in front of me, who'd finished her transaction, hadn't seen J-cub on my back in the sling and obviously thought I was talking to her, turned to me kindly and said "Yes, it is doing big beeping, isn't it dear?"

Reasons to be Cheerful - April '11

A little bit of a catch-up, framed in a list of Reasons to be Cheerful, just cos I need a bit of reminding sometimes.

Most of our days are now spent in the garden. There is nothing J-cub loves more than carrying around buckets of water, and any attempts I make to pick up a watering can are met with "No! Jacob!" and he comes and takes the watering can off me to do it himself. Most of my plants are therefore drowning, but it's nice that he's being helpful. And he looks about 6 in this photo, I can't believe how fast he's growing up:

We're looking after the school guinea pigs for the Easter holidays. We have the option of looking after them longterm, as the nursery class are kind of sick of them. I had guinea pigs up until J-cub's first summer, when old age and intense heat got to them. I've missed them so much, but having the cats is hard enough work on their own, without any further complications. But ... J-cub loves them, they're extremely tame and lovely, and they're cutting the grass for me. So maybe they'll stay:

My lovely fellow-babywearing friend Hannah came round for a sling workshop and an afternoon of fun. We went out for a walk in the woods (I use the term loosely, it's a managed forest and the bit in this photo has been harvested recently), just the two of us, and managed to craftily take photos of each other in a faux-walking pose, then photoshop them together. Awesome:

And, even more awesome, J-cub fell asleep, for the first time in I-don't-know-how-long, on my back. It was lovely:

We've moved J-cub's table out into the middle of the lounge, and he's started having his breakfast there, and having lots and lots (and lots) of tea parties throughout the day. I love our quiet breakfasts:

It's been hot enough for the paddling pool :D. J-cub hasn't quite got the hang of paddling in the pool, but he likes splashing round the edges and throwing things into it:

A day after last year's paddling pool was revived, a friend let me know that TK Maxx were selling Nemo paddling pools. I really need to do a separate post about J-cub's Nemo obsession. Suffice to say, he now has a Nemo paddling pool in the lounge, full of blankets and cushions, where he likes to chill out during his lulls. It'll replace the one in the garden in due course, but it's just too damn perfect at the moment to risk being all dirtied up:

Al-fresco meals. At least one a day, sometimes in the nude, always met with relish, and usually abandoned part-way through to go and chase an ant or investigate an interesting bird-call:

Languid days spent on the beach, investigating rock-pools and chasing crabs:

And most emphatically NOT PADDLING. Looking at worms near the water's edge yes, stepping into the (tiny, sun-warmed) waves no:

Playdates in friend's gardens, where the paddling pool, sandpit and slide are fought over, cries of "Mine!" grow ever-more deafening, and parents sit around and happily reminisce over that long-ago first summer, when we could sit in air-conditioned joy in Starbucks, drinking mocha frappuccinos while our babes drowsed in our arms (not that we'd change anything now, you understand, it's lovely to be out in the sun and their chattering and babbled conversations are amazing to listen to ... I just can't wait until they understand the concept of sharing):

And that pretty much brings us up to date. We're spending this weekend moving J-cub's bedroom from the box-room to the second bedroom. He needs the space, we don't. He's also (gasp) pretty much ready to go in to a bed. I am terrified. Wish us luck.

Day 40 - Wrapping in Cardiff Bay

I got two early birthday presents today. A new camera and my first ever woven wrap. The wrap actually arrived a couple of days ago but J-cub has been spectacularly uncooperative during our practise sessions and so I haven't been brave enough to try taking it out anywhere.

A close friend has his 40th birthday on Tuesday, and we went to Cardiff Bay to celebrate with him today. We bravely went out with no buggy, and no back-up Mei Tai. I got J-cub in and out of the wrap 3 times, learning a little more each time.

It's so comfy, so soft, and so much more supportive than I would have expected. I found it a little difficult to get the tightness right, as evidenced by the slightly wonky wrap below.

J-cub loved it though, and was super-excited to see lots of other babies, dogs and ducks from his vantage point.

There was a French food market in the Bay and we wandered around all the stalls, eating crepes and dodging the wasps which were besieging the sweet stalls. The market had thoughtfully laid on a massive fenced-in sandpit, complete with buckets and spades, where we dumped J-cub and ate our crepes. He lasted about 10 minutes before we were forced to remove him to stop him throwing sand at a fellow toddler. When Jamie picked him up and walked away, the child pointed at J-cub and said "No throwing!". I wish J-cub would understand that kind of sentiment rather than just smiling sweetly at us.

We didn't manage to stay very long at the actual party, as the pub was child-unfriendly and we were limited to a tiny room off the main bar, with no highchairs and nowhere for J-cub to work out his energy. Tantrums ensued.

We've rescheduled with them for later in the week to make up for skipping out early.

It was a lovely day though, and I came home buzzing from my babywearing success. It's so much easier to nip through crowds without a buggy and we got lots of admiring glances, mostly from older children. I feel a new addiction is starting...

Day 39 - Blog update (2)

(Friday August 27th)

It stopped raining today!

I was supposed to be going to a meeting of local babywearers for the first time which I was really looking forward to, especially after all the rain over the last week. Waking up this morning to find a gorgeous sunny day, but to still feel like my head is stuck in a pile of cotton wool was horrible.

Instead we spent a lazy day tearing up reams of toilet paper (when one of us took their eye off the other, and didn't respond to the ominous silence quickly enough), sleeping, almost running, falling over, playing in the (HOT!) garden and not eating wiggly worms. Because I have the reflexes of an archerfish.

On the bright side, we learnt the sign for worm.

J-cub refused a nap at 2pm, but conked out in the ring sling during the washing up at around 4pm and was quickly spirited into the cot. I had to wake him at 5.30, which I hate doing but I knew he'd never sleep tonight if I didn't, and I was royally punished with an ear-splitting, floor-thumping, kicking, biting, hitting, screaming tantrum which lasted over an hour.

He therefore didn't get his dinner til gone 7pm, but seemed happy enough watching funny kitten videos on youtube for the rest of the evening until bedtime at just before 9. Sometimes you just have to do what you have to do.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

And now the blog is up to date again! We've got an excitingly busy weekend coming up (it's my birthday on Monday, fact-fans) but I'll be back to share my spoils by Tuesday at the latest. Happy Bank Holiday!

Day 32 - Ringslinging

(Friday August 20th)

Probably stemming from a lack of sleep yesterday, J-cub was very clingy today. I had tons to get on with, but he didn't want to be left alone for a second. This is getting to be more and more the norm, with our time in the living room spent with me watching J-cub play, because he doesn't want interference from me, but equally he doesn't want me to do anything else. If I pick up the laptop, he slams the lid of it shut. If I pick up a book, he tears it out of my hand and throws it away.

He does love reading together, and drawing together, and singing nursery rhymes etc, but most games descend into rough and tumble play which can get a bit too rough and tumbly for my liking. The boy loves headbutting, and biting, and smacking, and throwing things. I'm not too keen on any of these.

So I'm taking to babywearing more and more around the house, in an attempt to keep up with day-to-day housework whilst simultaneously having nice calm, gentle cuddles with no violence. J-cub's favourite job is washing up, he especially likes it if I let him hold his hand under running water and flick bubbles around. But he's equally content to sit and watch, as long as I keep up a running commentary or sing to him. Today, the Mei Tai was in the car and it was raining, so I gave the ring sling another go. I'm not overly keen on the ring sling, it's not great for long carries as one-shoulder carries are uncomfortable with a heavy toddler, and I'm not experienced enough to stop worrying that he's going to fall out.

Today, the ring sling and I (and J-cub) clicked. I managed to get him in a really comfortable, secure position on my hip, and after some ring-positioning practice, got him onto my back. He sat there perfectly happily, resting his head on my shoulder and watching me work. It was lovely.

We had to go out to Asda later for some bits and bobs, and I took the ring sling as it was still raining and there's very few parent and child parking spaces. I got him in the sling quickly and put my waterproof coat on top of both of us. He stayed there happily until the excitement of several babies being pushed around the children's clothing aisle got too much for him and I had to switch him into the trolley.

I'm now kicking myself that at the last NCT Nearly New sale I attended, I passed up a beautiful Ellaroo ring sling for the bargainous price of £9. Instead I have a cheap and extremely thin plain cotton one for about £3 from ebay. I suppose it does the trick, but it would be so nice to have something a bit more sturdy. I'll be at the sling table at the next sale with bells on.

Day 30 - The boy eats curry

Ahhh it's so lovely to be up to date and only have one blog post to write today.

It's Jamie's day off today, and we kicked off the morning with a couple of hours play, as per usual, followed by an awesome three hour nap, which rather left me and Jamie twiddling our thumbs once we'd finished our usual showering/shaving/dressing/make-uping/tidying/cleaning routine. I do wish J-cub would tell us when he's going for a long sleep.

Still, at least it meant that by the time he'd woken up, had his lunch and got dressed, he had no time to make a mess of the lovely tidy lounge before we went out. We went to see some friends who bravely have three children, and spent the afternoon being dragged in various directions by all four of them, whilst attempting to maintain some semblance of adult conversation at the same time. It was lovely though, but J-cub got a bit overtired and grouchy when he wanted the blue ball, and Seren had the blue ball, and he didn't want the orange ball, even though it was identical, and Seren didn't want the orange ball, and she wouldn't give up the blue ball, and they had a big bawling screaming fight. Seren is 2 and a half and should know better. She should hide her balls before J-cub comes to visit.

J-cub absolutely adored their big trampoline, and actually seemed to know how to bounce on it. He liked falling down on it too:

By the time he ran out of steam it was gone 4pm, and we decided to venture into town rather than go straight home, and have dinner out somewhere. We had a quick scout round Toys R Us for a present for a friend's child, then crossed the road to Sainsbury's (oooh the glamour) for our tea. We found that children's meals were just £1 with any adult meal, and we ordered chicken curry and rice for J-cub (it also came with a Fruit Shoot and some fruit, bargain). I may have mentioned before that whilst we've been going through this J-cub-not-eating phase, nursery have reported that he'll happily eat curry, chilli, stew, all kinds of things which he wouldn't dream of touching at home. So we wanted to put him to the test. We had to wait AGES for the food to appear, which made us wish we'd spent another pound to get the child's snack meal to entertain him in the meantime. We managed to unearth some snacks from his change-bag though...

And when the chicken curry arrived, he tucked in with gusto. Using a real adult-sized spoon and fork, he wolfed it down. See, he can eat!

We were just about to leave when it started to hammer down, and with no coats or hats or raincovers we had to splash out (get it) £6.99 on a lovely new golfing umbrella. J-cub thought it was the best thing he'd ever seen:

We managed to get home dead-on 7pm, gave him a bottle, changed him and threw him into bed. It only took him another 2 hours of burbling and playing to fall asleep...

Day 16 - Polzeath

(Wednesday August 4th)

Another blast to the past today, we spent the day at Polzeath beach in North Cornwall. We had all our holidays here when I was little, every summer for as long as I can remember (and probably a long time before I can remember) we spent a week staying in holiday flats or cottages here, and drove down for day trips most weekends. It's the best beach, it's the beach that all beaches make me think of, and it's more like going home there than anywhere else (my parents don't live in the same house I grew up in).

I hadn't been for about 4 years, and I've been fantasising about taking J-cub there since he was born. We were a little unsure about going, as the weather forecast was doubtful, and we woke to pouring rain. In fact, we drove through pouring rain, right into Cornwall where it suddenly started to lighten up. When we got there, it was almost sunny, but we were practically knocked over by a freezing wind when we got out of the car. We swapped our nice beach attire for the warmest emergency jumpers we had in the car, our waterproof coats, and winter hats all round (unfortunately, we only had a sunhat for J-cub, which kept blowing off. I managed to unearth a warmish hat in the depths of our swimming bag, but it was newborn size and we could barely squeeze it on. And not one of the shops there sold warm children's hats. You'd think it was supposed to be Summer.

Just after the above photo was taken, I spied another babywearing mama carrying a tiny baby in a stretchy wrap, and her partner had their older child in a framed rucksack. She spied me at the same time and we exchanged smiles and pointed each other out to our respective husbands. I was too shy to go and say hello though, although I did make the point later on of searching to see if she'd seen me in the "I saw a real babywearer!" thread on naturalmamas. Sadly no mention of me, but then I was again too shy to make a post of my own.

We didn't let the bitter wind stop our beachy fun, and happily dove head-first into the sand for some sandcastle building...

... some climbing in and out of a large hole.

After we'd finished with the sand, we trugged round the shops, ate a chippy lunch out of the wind in a cafe, and wandered back up to the car when J-cub got tired out. Jamie popped him in the buggy and pushed him round til he fell asleep while I lay the front passenger seat back in the car, put my feet on the dashboard and had a blissful hour's sleep. I felt like a proper Dad.

When I woke up, it was to the strange feeling of being warm. Very warm. I got out the car to find J-cub had just woken up and the sun had firmly got his hat on. Rather than our original plan of going home mid-afternoon, we decided to stay and make the most of the day, and go down to the sea (Polzeath beach is huge, and it was high tide when we got there. By mid-afternoon, it was low tide, and it's like a different beach. There are massive exposed rockpools, and the beach seems unending).

After a quick stop in Spar to stock up on picnic supplies, we went down to the sea and J-cub discovered the thrill of sun-warmed rock- and tide-pools. We saw lots of fish and crabs...

...and chased a (seagull)duck half-way across the beach (that tiny blue blur you can see? That's him).

We got back to the car at 6pm, and my little sausage was so worn out that he just lay on the Mei Tai where I'd lowered him to the ground. We had a cobbled together picnic and set off home after 7pm. It was a gorgeous day.

Babywearing Japanese style

I've just finished reading my best find from the Borders sale. I'd never seen or heard of this book before, and could not comprehend that something could exist that could so neatly marry mine and Jamie's interests - autism (me) and Manga (him).

The book is a faithfully-translated Manga book (it reads right-to-left) and gives a fictional account of raising an autistic boy from birth through diagnosis into schooling. Apparently, these books and similar are widely published in Japan as guides to various aspects and difficulties of life. It's a lovely read, and my head has been translating everything into Manga ever since I started reading it.

My point for this post is that the mother in the book, Sachiko, is shown wearing her young daughter, Kanon, in a few frames. Over at Marvelous Kiddo, Leigh likes to big up celebrities seen out and about wearing their babies. I thought I'd further the cause by adding an example from a different medium.

39. Find J-cub a nursery place

(<--- that's a temporary picture, as I obviously didn't take it (obviously cos I don't go to pubs very often, and if I do, I don't spend time in there writing numbers in pints of Guiness. I used to be a dab hand at the cloverleaf back in the day though) and I'll update it when my camera has fully charged batteries, which it doesn't at the moment, and I have no patience to wait.)

So today we went to see the nursery we want J-cub to go to, as it's just a couple of minutes away from my workplace, so he can be there for the minimum amount of time (I have a 30 minute commute, so if he went to somewhere near home, he'd be there for an extra hour). It was very nice, all the staff were welcoming and enthusiastic and qualified, and the children were happy. However, I came away feeling strange on two accounts.

Firstly, I don't want to go back to work. I don't want to have someone else raising my child, albeit for just one full day and one two-thirds of a day. I don't want to miss his milestones, or even to miss the day-to-day mundaneness which makes parenthood so constantly amazing. It makes me sad to think that in just over 2 months time, this year off will come to an end and I'll have to return to real life. We don't have a choice, we couldn't afford for one of us not to work at all, and even if we could, I couldn't give up my job (which I love) and make Jamie work full time at his job (which he hates). That would be desperately unfair. So instead, we've compromised by both going part time. I'll work Monday-Wednesday, with J-cub in nursery Monday and Tuesday, and at home with Jamie on Wednesdays and at home with me Thursday and Friday. We'll see how it goes anyway, both of our jobs are pretty flexible which is nice. Anyway, it's all self-pity and blah, I know I have to go, so I have to get on with it.

Secondly, I didn't realise our parenting style was so odd. We didn't have any particularly strong views about parenting before or even during my pregnancy. Since J-cub arrived though, we've been completely baby-led, taking his cues for feeding, sleeping, eating, routines, everything. This is known as Attachment Parenting, although we haven't been able to follow it in all areas, due to my inability to breastfeed (due to complications from the start, I mixed fed for 6 months, and haven't stopped beating myself up about it yet) and Jamie's inability to function on anything less than strong painkillers and antidepressants (which are big no-no's for co-sleeping).

Today though, you would have thought we were from another planet. The nursery had no knowledge of baby-led weaning, which isn't really surprising since even a lot of health professionals seem to be clueless. They were at least receptive to it, and happy for J-cub to have toddler meals, and not to spoon feed him or force him to eat. They seemed surprised he wore sleeping bags to sleep in, which I thought were much more common. My mention of baby-signing was met with blank stares - no comprehension of what I was talking about at all ("Did she say baby signing?"). Luckily, one of the staff in the baby room overheard and piped up that he'd learnt signing as part of an SEN course he'd done, and he seemed very keen to put it in action. Maybe we'll be lucky and he'll be J-cub's keyworker. We don't have a routine during the day and he just sleeps when he needs it - I guess we'll fight those battles when we come to them as they asked if he goes into the cot awake and I said no, and they looked worried.

Maybe I'm being unfair on them, maybe they didn't care. I just came away with the impression that they thought we were weird hippies. I think it's just that I don't see what we're doing as that unusual. Then again, I read blogs and forums by parents who are following the ideals of Attachment Parenting; I don't read blogs and forums by parents who are following Gina Ford routines. I suppose we'll just have to see how it goes. We left J-cub in the baby room while we went into the office, and he was absolutely fine.

At least it's done, and that's another weight off my mind. Nothing to stop me going back to work now though :(

And you can't have a photo of the nursery, because then you might track down J-cub and steal him (he is very cute, I wouldn't blame you). Instead, have a few pictures of our trip to the beach afterwards:

Me wearing J-cub in the Mei Tai

A crab in a lobster pot

J-cub walking over to check out the contents of a lobster pot

Day 10 - Mission complete.