Amigurumi

Do you remember this? After far too long, I've figured out how to attach it to the ceiling above J-cub's cot, and it's now in situ, helping him to stay up way past his bedtime every day.

He loves it. And we've discovered that by twisting it one way, it spins the other way when released (funny, that). J-cub LOVES it, and we spent a happy 5 minutes before bathtime excitedly watching it.

Also in his room is a hot air balloon I crocheted, with a little pink bunny sitting in the basket. It was supposed to have a bear, but the bunny seemed to enjoy the ride more. I crocheted this for him not long after he was born, I think, and it hung in the lounge above the travel cot where he used to have his daytime naps. It's now moved to his bedroom, and is equally spinny-fun-making.

Finally, there's his collection of little crocheted friends, which I made while I was pregnant. Some were from free Internet patterns, but most were from the same source as the bird mobile and the hot air balloon: these fab books by Ana Paula Rimoli. If you have a crocheting bone in your body, I highly recommend you check them out, as the designs are beautiful, and they make perfect baby-presents. And if I can do them, anyone can, as I'd never picked up a crochet hook before the last couple of months of my pregnancy.

I need to get back into it, as I've been on a bit of a hiatus since I finished the bird mobile, which took me forever to complete. My fingers are very itchy in the evening, and I think having something to do stops my brain from going too loopy in the quiet-times after J-cub has gone to sleep. What I really need, is to get up the duff again, so I can make something for the new baby. Not that I'm at all broody, oh-ho no ;)

Does my bum look big in this?

We're now at the end of our second week of using Mother-ease cloth nappies, and it's been a resounding success. It's bin day today, and rather than putting out a binbag chock-full of nappies from the upstairs and downstairs nappy bins, there were no more than a dozen or so disposable nappies, from overnight (J-cub is a very heavy wetter and we didn't fancy his chances in a cloth overnight) and from one day last week where he had a dodgy bum.

We've got 15 cloth nappies, which is enough to wash every 3 days (at a push) or every 2 days with time to get them dry. And with some experimentation, we've discovered that a pop-in booster (to absorb extra wetness) and a fleece liner (to wick away moisture) keeps him nice and dry for between 3 to 4 hours.

My main problem is that most of his clothes no longer fit him. At birth, J-cub weighed 8lb12oz, but he lost around 12% of his birthweight and was very slow to regain it, due to our problems with feeding. I knew I was having a big baby, so we had lots of 0-3 month sized clothes, and just a couple of Newborn sized vests. We had to quickly rectify that (everyone told me not to buy many clothes as we'd be inundated with gifts of packs of vests and the like. All of our friends evidently knew that, and elected not to inundate us, which resulted in us having NO gifts of clothes, so we had to make emergency trips to Tesco at 2am to buy Newborn sized vests, and sleepsuits, and socks when we realised that everything else was swamping him). He was in Newborn clothes for 5 weeks, and then quickly zoomed up through the sizes. At 7 months old, he was in 12-18 month clothing. Luckily, his growth has slowed since then (I say luckily, as we couldn't afford to keep going through a year's worth of clothing in 6 months), and at 13 months old he's only just growing out of the 12-18 month size.

Of course, I've been stocking up on the next size in the sales, buying bits and bobs of 18-24 month clothes here and there. But with his new, massive, cloth bum, none of that fits him. And the 2-3 size is ridiculously long in the leg.

When he went into the 12-18 month size, I managed to buy 4 pairs of cord dungarees off ebay for the bargain price of £8. 3 of the pairs are Osh Kosh B'Gosh, which I think must be cut for cloth bums as they have always been massive on his bum, and now look perfect. They are about the only thing other than jogging bottoms which still fit him, but heavy cord is not really what you're looking for in a light summer wardrobe.

I've had a look around websites like Frugi, which sell clothes cut for cloth bums, but they are well out of my price range (bearing in mind that I consider £7 Tesco trousers to be out of my price range). And I'm not really in an ebaying mood at the moment (which, trust me, is a Good Thing). My only option is to crack out the sewing machine, and make some myself. My main problem with that is that I'm much more comfortable working with heavy fabrics like cord or denim, as they seem to be more forgiving of mistakes. I've never worked with any sort of stretchy fabric, which would seem ideal for accommodating a big bum. I'm going to have to bite the bullet though, and give it a go. If only he were a girl, then he could just wear dresses and be done with it.

My lovely Mum (and Dad) came to visit earlier this week, and whilst discussing this problem, and demonstrating how nicely his Osh Kosh dungies fit him, she offered to knock up a few pairs in a lightweight summer fabric (my Mum is a genius sewer). She traced the OK's on a piece of newspaper, and cantered off home, stopping to buy some lightweight checked summer cotton at her favourite fabric store on the way. She's back in a couple of weeks time to help me knock the garden into shape, so hopefully he'll have some lovely new outfits to wear by then. In the meantime, my parents kindly went to Tesco and bought him 2 pairs of stretchy jogging bottoms so we have an alternative to making him wear his PJ's all day.

Thanks, Mum and Dad.

Yesterday was our first properly hot and sunny day. And, for the first time, I got the nappies drying on the line. It was lovely, and I felt nice and smug.

Happy Easter!

What a difference a year makes - this time last year I remember it being warm and sunny, a friend came to visit and we sat outside with J-cub asleep in his moses basket, before going for a walk in the Mumbles while the sun set. Today it's not so bad as it has been over the last week; at least it's not raining, but it is freezing. We took J-cub out to play in the garden for a bit and wrapped him up warm in his hooded bear coat. Last year he was just wearing a vest and sleepsuit (although I was probably not quite as good then as I am now at knowing how many layers to put on him. It's quite shocking, looking back through old videos, in how many of them he is shivering. BAD mummy).

We've all had a lovely day today, although J-cub wasn't well enough to go to his best friend Poppy's birthday party, which made us all sad. He has cut another tooth (his tenth - half way there!) which might account for his runny bum yesterday, and for part of his cold symptoms and temperature. He perked up considerably this afternoon, and enjoyed playing in his ballpit and learning to stack cups.

He also amazed us earlier, when he was standing up holding onto his toy basket with one had, and turned around to look at me. I offered him a piece of toast, which he took with his free hand, then let go with his other hand and stood there eating it! I swear he practises when we're not looking.

Anyway, the point of this post is to wish people a Happy Easter, and to show how thankful I am that Cadbury's decided not to change their Wispa egg packaging from last year to this year.

What a difference a year makes:

2009 - Aged 4 weeks

2010 - Aged 1 year, 3 and a half weeks

A Day in Pictures

I've started writing about 20 different blog posts today, but gave up on all of them. Instead, I've decided to share some of the hundreds of photos I take of my boy each day. Today has been (of course) marred by coughing, runny nose, diarrhoea and vomiting. When will it end???

We've still managed to have a lovely day though. I thought maybe there were too many photos here to post, but I don't really care. This blog is for me, as well as you, and I like them. So there.

07:00 Up at the crack of dawn, we decide to beat the Easter crowds and get our shopping done early after dropping Jamie off at the train station to go to Manchester to see his beloved United

07:15 - J-cub has a power nap

07:45 - Home and smug with all the shopping done

12:41 - J-cub is feeling poorly and hungry and tired

13:02 - Happily eating rice-cake, houmous and salmon before being sick everywhere

13:20 - Back to his favourite spot, resting on his fleece blanket

13:32 - Streaming with cold

13:34 - Playing some music

13:38 - Tired and grumpy and ready for bed

15:04 - J-cub went down for his nap at 13:45. At 14:30, after my lunch, I went back to bed too. It takes me ages to fall asleep, and I was just dropping off when I heard him banging around. New favourite game = balancing Things on Other Things. Jemaine and Blue Ted on the cot rail.

15:05 - Slapping the wall (J-cub is experienced at making the most noise possible in his cot)

15:06 - Waving for the camera

15:36 - More balancing - squishy ball on the back of the chair...

15:37 - ...and dummy on the back of the chair

16:42 - Walk to the duckpond with giraffe ears in place to quell the angry sobs caused by having his nappy changed

16:43 - I join in the giraffe-ear fun. I meant just to walk to the duckpond and back, but he kept looking up at me with such delight that I kept on walking. We walked for an hour, all around the woods surrounding our village. I was unprepared for the mud (wearing suede boots), the 2 massive hills (forgot my inhaler) and the effort of the walk (I managed to switch the Mei Tai from my front to my back without taking J-cub out, never done that before). We saw 2 ducks and 3 dogs and it was VERY exciting

18:06 - Tea of toast, yoghurt and pear to prevent any further bad tummyness. J-cub adores pears.

Fun on the Farm

I've been meaning to post this all week, but work and illness (Jacob's) have not allowed me any free time at all.

Last weekend, Nurse Rachel came to stay, as she'd only been here for a few hours at J-cub's family party and wanted to spend some more time with him. We hadn't really wanted to do anything other than relax all weekend, but talk somehow turned to zoo animals and before long we were googling our local zoo options. They turned out to be twofold: Anna Ryder Richardson's wildlife park (near Tenby), and Folly Farm (near, um, Tenby). It seems the two zoos in Wales (there may be more, I'm overgeneralising) are 5.8 miles apart. Not really the best business plan that.

After comparing websites and restaurants and baby facilities and number and type of animals, we elected to go to Folly Farm. I had been there several years ago, on a school trip, when I was caught up with trying to encourage the teachers that we were there to look at the animals, not to sit on benches while the children played on the adventure playgrounds. Since then, they have got themselves some giraffes, which got J-cub very excited at going.

It was a lovely day, all sunny and fresh and springlike, and after a relatively easy drive (only marred by some bizarre procession of walkers and policepeople which we got stuck behind for 15 minutes before they inexplicably vanished) we arrived bright and early (which seemed even earlier, as the clocks went forward overnight).

(Let's just have an aside about the clocks. The clocks went FORWARD. I thought, then, that when J-cub thought it was between 6 and 7, and therefore time to wake up, we would be delighted to see it say between 7 and 8 on our clock. Did that happen? Of course not. When J-cub woke for the day at 10 to 5 ... his body clock KNEW it was really 10 to 4. Did that stop him? No. Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, he was happy wandering around downstairs and went down for his nap at 8am. He does it just to keep us on our toes, I'm sure).

Anyway, he was all alert and happy when we got there, and was happy poking around at the sheep, goats, pigs, ponies and donkeys in the farm bit and the iguanas, guinea pigs, rabbits, tortoises, birds, chipmunks and chicks in the pet bit. We had lunch, and a bottle and a nap in the buggy for J-cub, while I pushed him around and Jamie and Rachel played on the arcade game things. When he woke up we went down to see the giraffes, who were a-ma-zing. I mean, I know they're tall. But when you're confronted with one standing in front of you, and you're thinking "Crikey, that really is TALL...", and then another one walks up and you realise the one you were looking at is a youngster and his friend is towering above him, it screws with your perspective and makes you feel like falling over. Or maybe that's just me.

J-cub loved them, although his 'love' of giraffes is entirely inflicted by me, as I craved giraffes in the same way some women crave bananas and sardines when they're pregnant. I was convinced the baby would like giraffes, and bought giraffes left, right and centre. Luckily, he seems to echo this affinity, and drags Jemaine the giraffe with him wherever he goes.

After the giraffes, and a quick change of clothes as somebody had forgotten to change somebody else's nappy since they arrived (I'm not naming names), we looked round the rest of the zoo animals, most notable being the shaggy camels and the cute little meerkats. Who doesn't love a meerkat?

We had a big play in the massive indoor play centre/vintage funfair, then bought some crap souvenirs and drove home. Bearing in mind that it's March, I managed to get my face all sunburned, and walked around looking like a tomato for the rest of the evening.

J-cub further delighted us by waking up at 2.30am and screaming for hours, but that's another story.

1. Waving hello, 2. Goat for lunch, 3. Stroking a pony, 4. Watching the Meerkats, 5. Cute ponies, 6. Meeting a goat, 7. Seeing the giraffes, 8. Giraffe, 9. Tall giraffe, 10. Shy giraffes, 11. Group shot, 12. Shaggy camels

Reasons to be Cheerful

I don't know whether it's the after-effects of work, or the fact that I've barely seen any of my friends for weeks, or the constant rain, but I've been struggling to keep my head above water lately, where 'water' refers to 'the deep, dark and dangerous pool where post-natal depression lies dormant, waiting to pounce on me the moment I stop paddling'.

Today I got close to not going swimming (literally, not metaphorically), and when I stop doing things (especially things I've paid in advance for) then it's a swift fall into not leaving the house, not talking to anyone, and sitting on the sofa crying all day. I desperately didn't want to go: I didn't want to talk to anyone, I didn't want to dance around a swimming pool merrily singing "Splish, splash, splish, splash, aroooooouuunnndd aaaaand UP in the air!", I didn't want all the effort of undressing and drying and dressing an over-tired, hungry baby. But I managed to go, I managed to avoid talking to anyone (it's very easy, you just don't talk to anyone), and it was a bit shit as J-cub was not at all in the mood and I felt like an awful mother for putting my needs (to push myself to go) over his (to stay home and have a nap).

After we got home and J-cub had had his long-awaited nap, he woke up like an angel, happy and fun and full of the joys of spring. So I thought I'd better try and perk myself the hell up, and think about the things that have made me happy this week. And I might even get around to contributing to the 'What are your strengths as a Mum' thread on the BLW forum, which I've been avoiding like the plague as my brain just laughs at me every time I look at it. (See? I can't stop it. I AM A GOOD MUM. And I'm trying very hard to be a happy Mum).

Reasons to be Cheerful:

#1 - Giant Cookies

I made giant cookies. Giant cookies are the reason why I haven't lost my baby-weight yet - quite frankly, the Tesco Finest cookies are the best cookies I've ever tasted and I therefore find it impossible to pass them by, just in case they stop making them. And they're £1.something for 4, and they just make me happy. I found this recipe, and gleefully set to making them. The ended up HUGE, as I misread the recipe slightly and dropped half cups on the baking sheet, rather than quarter-cups. They were too sugary for my taste, but still yummy. Sadly, not a patch on the Tesco ones.

#2 - Teddy Bear's Picnic

Jacob and his Daddy had a teddy bear's picnic. This was one of the post-sickness-and-diarrhoea, not-quite-keen-on-eating-yet, and don't-you-dare-take-me-anywhere-near-the-highchair-or-I'll-have-a-massive-tantrum days. We sat on the floor with plates of appetising foods (toast, yoghurt, clementine, rice cake) and nibbled them whilst making yummy noises. J-cub, unable to resist such temptation, started joining in. And so did his teddies.

#3 - Stir-fry for lunch

This was the first full meal since his birthday party, and he tucked in with relish. During his absence from meals he seems to have been secretly practising how to use a spoon and fork in combination to eat noodles - he coped admirably, and wolfed down the Quorn pieces. It was lovely to see him eating again, although we were at the table for well over an hour and I had got a bit bored by the end of it. I need to learn not to eat my portion in less than 5 minutes.

#4 - Cloth nappies

The new nappies arrived today, and have spent most of the day being pre-washed ready for use tomorrow. I can't wait. Prepare yourselves for lots of photos of J-cub's bum, clad in various cheery colours.

#5 - Jacob

Really, when I'm being an idiot like I am at the moment, I just need to stop and look at him. What more reason is there? How ridiculous is it that I have spent more than half my adult life trying to have a baby, distraught at the thought that it won't happen, and then when it does, my body rebels against me and makes me feel unhappier than I ever have? I am so lucky to have him, he is so absolutely perfect, and so funny. At the moment, he's learnt how to 'hide' behind one of his hands (so half his face is completely exposed), and will happily play 'Peepo!' for hours (substituting his hand for whatever he's got in his hand, like a plate, or a book, or a hat, or his shoe...), giggling like a maniac when you 'find' him.

He's learnt what "I'm coming to get you!" means, and will shriek with delight and crawl off at top speed (for a couple of steps, before he stops to make sure you're following him) before collapsing in hysterical laughter when you catch him. And after Jemaine (his bestest friend, the giraffe in the picture) had to be dishwashered to remove any residual sickness germs (he said surface wash only so I was scared to put him in the washing machine), then took ages to dry so J-cub was without him for more than 24 hours, he's loved him all the more. He's taken to carrying him around in his mouth like a kitten. It's the cutest thing in the world.

The kindness of strangers, and friends, and family

Cute bum in his TotsBots wrap

Now that J-cub's turned a year old, and we seem to have cracked most areas of raising a baby (really?), we've been thinking about branching out into cloth nappies.

Our reasons for not having done so thus far are as follows:

1. I read the government paper into the environmental impact of reusable vs. disposable while I was pregnant, which concluded that the impact is only significantly lower in reusables if you don't tumble dry them, and if you use them for more than one child. Here in rainy Wales, living in a house with little available clothes-airer space, we tend to use our tumble dryer quite a lot. And having taken the best part of 6 years to get knocked up, I couldn't say for sure that we'd get to have another one.
2. We are rubbish at doing laundry. The floordrobe in our bedroom is testament to this - piles of clean clothes never get put away, because they're stacked in front of the closed wardrobe doors, and the piles get higher and higher and it's just silly. I hate laundry, it's so stupidly time-consuming, having a domestic task which takes more than a day to complete, has several physically-tiring components and which you're expected to do more than once a week.
3. A good friend had tried them, and hated them, and put me off.
4. We didn't have the available cash to make the initial outlay, and kept being given vouchers for disposables.
5. When J-cub arrived, everything was so ridiculously difficult that it never really crossed my mind again. I would say that only in the last couple of months have I started to feel like I actually know what I'm doing, and to feel comfortable with our day-to-day life, and maybe like I need a new challenge.

Triggered by my final 3 unpaid months of maternity leave, when money wasn't so much tight as entirely non-existent, I started to talk about getting some cloth so we wouldn't have the cost of disposables in our weekly budget. I also think that it'll be easier to get the hang of them now, and get into a good system of washing and drying, now that living day-to-day with a baby isn't such a massive struggle. And then we'll be experienced enough to use them from the start next time, and can re-use the ones we get now for the next baby, so everyone's a winner (especially me, because I get to have another baby! Not yet though, obviously. But maybe soon, please?).

A friend very kindly told me that she had a load of cloth nappies which she no longer had any use for, and which I was welcome to. We ummed and ahhed a bit more, then decided to give it a go and collected them a few weeks ago. Cloth nappies nowadays come in a frightening variety of types and shapes and brands and colours and fabrics and absorbencies, which websites like the Cloth Nappy Tree helpfully detail to guide you through the maze. The ones my friend gave me were pocket nappies, which have a waterproof outer layer, and an inner pocket which you stuff with a variety of fabrics to soak up the pee. We excitedly tried one, and it leaked. I started reading up on why leaks might occur, and the reasons seemed to be endless. Too much stuffing causes gaping around the legs, and the pee comes out. Too little stuffing and the pee has nowhere to go, so it comes out. If a tiny bit of the inner fabric isn't covered by the outer layer, then your baby's clothes wick the pee out. If your baby's clothes are too tight, then the pee gets squeezed out. And of course, the nappies might be too big, or too small.

I spent ages trying to figure out where I was going wrong, and trying different combinations of stuffing materials, and looser clothes, but all to no avail. I came to the conclusion that all but one of the nappies were too small for J-cub. He is a big boy, the size of an 18 month old at just 12 months, and all but one of the nappies are a medium size. Consensus seemed to be that he needs a large.

I started to investigate the other types (by this point my head was reeling - and in fact I've been dreaming about Swaddlebees and Minkis and Blueberries and TotsBots and MEOS and bamboo and hemp and fleece and prefolds and wraps for weeks now, it's very tiring.), and picked up a couple of cheap fitted nappies to try, which are shaped like a disposable and have a separate waterproof wrap to cover them. My experiments with pockets had kind of put me off continuing down that route, but they're very popular so don't let me put you off if you're reading this and looking for advice about what to get. I should probably put a disclaimer somewhere around here which says "I'm mental, don't listen to anything I say, especially when I'm giving my opinion about things, because I'm usually wrong".

The fitted nappy with a wrap worked well, fit J-cub nicely and were easy to wash and dry. Another friend demonstrated her system to me, consisting of Mother-ease one size (MEOS) nappies and Mother-ease Air Flow wraps (left); the combination of which were far less bulky than the ones I'd been trying.

I started having a look around ebay for some cheap ones to try, which proved practically impossible as most cloth nappies have a high resale value, even when used.

I happened across a posting on my local Netmums nearly new board, offering a free (FREE!) Mother-ease trial pack consisting of 3 different ME nappies, a wrap, a pop-in insert and a roll of paper liners. I emailed the lister quickly and crossed my fingers. She got back to me quickly, saying she lived a few miles away and would drop them off the next day. The trial pack was worth £38, but she didn't want any money for it, and brought it right to my door.

And they fit beautifully! One of the sized nappies and the wrap were sized small, so I've put them away for the next baby. I tried the nappies with the wrap I already had, by TotsBots, and while it's not a perfect fit, it'll do.

So that just left me with trying to pick up enough nappies to get going with. Around 20 seems to be the suggested amount, and at £10 each (ish) new, that's a lot of money. Even at knocked-down prices on ebay and usednappies.co.uk, bundles of nappies and wraps go for well over £100. Yet another friend offered me her complete stash for £100, which for what she was offering, was a massive bargain. But again, actually coming up with £100 in cash is way beyond our means. Have I mentioned that I stupidly rammed my car into a bollard a couple of weeks ago, and have a £300 excess to pay?

I finally mentioned our dilemma to my Dad during a phone conversation this afternoon, and a few minutes after I ended the call I received an email from him telling me to order what I need and he'll put the money in my account. THANKS Dad ;)

Rainbow MEOS

So now I'm off to make my order, and to commence on our cloth nappy adventure. And to brush aside those feelings of guilt that I haven't done it earlier, because better late than never, right? And at least we can do it right next time around. Just maybe after the meconium is all out of the way. And the breastmilk-poo explosions.